Chai me!

Every once in a while, you hear something or, as in this case, say it yourself and then crack up when you notice how it sounds.

Yesterday a fellow teacher was headed to the dining hall for a coffee but stopped by my room first in order to ask me if she could bring some back for me as well. I accepted her offer but rather than coffee, I decided I'd like some chai tea, so I told her, "Chai me."

Now, it sounds funny enough to order a drink in this imperative way, as if you're playing checkers and demanding "King me!" of your opponent. Why is it funny? I dunno- I guess because you're treating the object like a verb. But then of course "Chai me" sounds like "Try me!" which has this antagonistic ring to it, like a parent daring a child to continue making noise in the backseat to earn a deserved severe punishment. But then it also sounds like "chimey" as in: Roger McGuinn's 12-string Rickenbacker produced a "chimey" sound on The Byrds' recording of "Turn, Turn, Turn." It also sounds like a certain Semitic slur but is too far away from the actual sound to really offend anyone.

If I've done anything of note here today, dear readers, it is only that every time you see the word "chai" on a coffee shop menu from now on throughout the rest of your life, you will remember this phrase "Chai me" and you will chuckle to yourself. No need to thank me.